Brenkster Tools

Intermission

by Manuel | | April 2nd, 2009 | Manuel, comics, previews, tools

Dear person I‘ve never met and I will never know,

I‘m running without knowing why, I share the memories of someone who is unknown to me. Who am I? Why are these memories meant for me? What do they mean?

I‘m running…

They made me a gift… they made me what I am, and as some sort of a sick joke, I don‘t know who they are. I don‘t know if you understand what I mean… or if you would even like to understand it. Someone, I dont know who, made me a gift and I‘m not even able to thank him for it.

I‘m running…

They gave me love, hate… the ability to feel and to fear, yes, fear. But not the fear for the death. No, death is not meant for me. It is fear of failure, the fear of going too far. Everything seems like a bloody joke if you are not even able to be affraid to die, nothing makes sense if you are not even able to feel the time. Who am I, you might ask? A being built upon metaphysical forces? Am I flesh and blood? Who are you? I‘m scared, I‘m scared of myself…

I‘m running…

Running through time, running for a life I‘m meant to protect. I don‘t know who‘s it is or why I‘m supposed to do it. Bloody hell, I don‘t even know for who‘m I‘m doing it… but I do as I am told… Why? Good god, WHY?! I‘m scared, scared of losing my mind… or have I lost it already? Where are you, who are you? Why do I feel you… why are you so far away?

Everything for you, and I don‘t even know who you are… all these feelings and I can‘t even put them together. Is it naive for me to say that I‘m afraid of you? Why do they want you? Or is it in the end just me and me alone? Why in god‘s name do I want you, feel you? Why do I feel love, why have they given me this valuable gift? To find you, the one I don‘t know about?

I miss you…

…your touch I‘ve never felt, your kiss I‘ve never tasted… YOUR smell that never ran through my nose. I can almost feel you like a sweet tasty peach on the warm and soft lips of a precious, young girl.

I‘m confused…

Even though I‘ve never met you before, even though you might never read these lines, I want you to know something that‘s very important for me… you are the only person that is to be trusted in a corrupted world. A world of fear, a world of hate, a world of despair.

Even though you will never meet me, I hate you. Even though you will never talk to me, I‘m affraid of you… even though you will never touch me, I feel you. And for the worst part, god help us all…

… I love you.

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